Denial?

Nov. 24th, 2009 12:29 am
jawburn_steel: red and green, women duelling (duelling women)
[personal profile] jawburn_steel
Denial. We know what it is, but ... We can't. I mean, no-one can. What should we deny? Who should we say no to? Ourselves?

We used to think you could say no, once upon a time. *smiles ruefully* We were young though. All children think that, don't they? We did too. We thought the world would be the way we wanted it, that we could pick and choose the parts we liked and discard the rest.

We thought we could say no, when we wanted. We thought we could deny that it didn't work that way.

We learned better.

But still. Denial is not ... there isn't ... There is so much you can do, so much you can take, so much you can enjoy, and if you say no ... you lose that, some of it. If you forget, if you don't let yourself see what you can't change ... you lose what you can have in spite of it.

We can be taken. We can be hurt, wounded, used, killed. We can be destroyed. We can die tomorrow. We can say no to none of it. We can deny none of it.

We don't want to.

Because tomorrow we can die, and while we know that we can take what we want today, and make it count. We can love today, against tomorrow's pain. We can win today, against tomorrow's loss. We can give today, before they steal it tomorrow. We can live, today and tomorrow and as long as we can, and when Death comes we can smile at him because we had everything and loved it too before he came.

*smiles* Ask us something. Anything. If it is ours, we'll give it to you, and take more tomorrow. Ask us for love, life, pain, surrender, glory or death. You can have it all, and we'll deny you none. *laughs* We have no reason to. We have a bigger enemy than you, and a bigger love, and when he comes he'll find us well used, well emptied, and well satisfied.

And he can have a kick in the teeth and a kiss before we go, and be happy for it!

 

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